A Little Bit of Humor 4 Weeks Later

There is not a single doubt that Robb and I have been blessed. We were surrounded by love and friendship before the fire and it was exponentially felt after the fire. We are forever grateful for the generosity and support that has filled our lives since we lost all of our belongings and treasures on July 31^st, 2011 at about 10:00pm.

So many people we hold dear have come through for Robb and I. We never expected so much support on our GoFundMe.com site. We are even more gracious of the amount of people interested in following our recovery on this blog. What has been most interesting and warming are the thoughtful, and sometimes hilarious, tokens friends have sent us, to lighten our spirits.

No matter what happens through an experience like this there is no doubt that people will surprise you. And some of our friends really have; simply by replacing parts of our lives, would have never known, they appreciated as much as we do.

Since college where I sacrificed a couple of years on a crew team, I have been ruined when it comes to spandex.  If a couple of days go by, and I have not worn something stretchy and reminiscent of a leotard, then my priorities are not in order. Thus, it is no surprise that I was wearing the tight elastic fabric when the house burned down. It may, although, come as a surprise to most of you, that the spandex were bright purple, 10 years old and paired with a torn, teal wife beater. And, to some of you, none of this comes as a surprise.

I should have probably set a timer for certain things. For example, timed how long it took for me to have my first huge break down after the fire. Timed how long Robb could stand being in the house even though it smelled rank and depressing. Timed how long I would go without wearing underwear. Actually, I did time that. Four days. My mom finally bought me some and they were glorious. Finally, I should have timed how long it would take someone to replace my charred spandex collection. Truly, when I think about it (just like with the underwear) it is not when they were replaced but the story of how.

Of course, Mary Jameson blessed me with the gift of everlasting elastic. She was there in the boat with me when I first wore those purple hinny huggers. Just like my mom was there the first day I learned to wear underwear and promptly remove them for mid day naked time. Sometimes, people just know about a part of you that most other people prefer to never hear about.

Underwear and spandex, although incredibly prominent aspects of my life, were not the only cherished and incredibly insightful gifts I myself received from friends and family. Most people are unaware of my fascination on carnivorous plants. I had cared for one by the name of "Sweet Pea" in Santa Barbara. She made it through the cross-country move, only to die over the winter (it's been a rough year folks).

After I recovered from the loss of dear little "Sweet Pea", I mustered the strength to start again. I purchased "Lilith" and the two "Dina"s. They perished in the fire. Things were going pretty rough in the carnivorous plant aspect of my life. I was beginning to think I was cursed. I would never have a flytrap again. I had become isolated from the loss and could not speak to anyone of my intense and unhealthy love for these life-sucking organisms. Who cares about the original irreplaceable artwork, my shoes collection, the computer and photographic supplies, Robb's motorcycle and truck. I wanted to have my insectivorous plants back. But how?

Within a week after the fire a package arrived. Inside was a terrarium, a vial of dead flies, a bunch of little plastic bones, a sign that read Beware of Plant, and the newest guinea pig in my life experiment of attempting to keep a Venus fly trap alive for more that a year. OH NO SHE DIDN'T!!! Stephanie Kellye Harmon Stark III, you know me. You knew I wanted to wear my purple spandex, and tend to 10 tiny mouths. All is right in the world.

It is obvious that I am a very lucky person. I am lucky to have survived the fire with the love of my life unscathed and to still be blessed with 4 incredible and ridiculously adorable pets. I could go on for days about each person who has helped us. Humbled. Truly humbled. And then there is Brian. Brian Lipps. Brian, if you are reading this sit down. I don't think you realize the absolute hilariousness your gift has brought into our lives.

A couple of years ago, Robb and Brian enjoyed a couple of libations, at a Bar-B-Q Robb and I were having at our home in Santa Barbara. No big deal. Normal Bar-B-Que behavior. All was well until someone (I) found Robb and Brian slow dancing. Robb was wearing a Darth Vader helmet. I could not un-see this. The helmet was one of those man treasures Robb kept hidden from me in plain sight. Right behind all the other man treasures. I never knew it existed. And don't mind me while I completely ignore the fact that my fiancé was slow dancing with another man. To me, Darth was the most disconcerting aspect. Truly.

As with everything else in the house, Darth burned. We had so much we needed to replace and little means to do so, but with the support of everyone around us, we were making it through. Simply by adhering to frugality and extra hours at my part time job, we new we would be fine. Especially since purchasing spandex, underwear and a new flytrap were off the list. Things were looking up.

About a week and a half after the fire, we received a package from Brian Lipps. It was about 12" square. I wasn't sure what he had sent, although knowing him is would be a gift certificate wrapped tightly with plastic wrap (so that you could not get to it unless you unraveled the whole thing), and then placed in a box. Robb simply said, "I wish he sent me a Darth Vader helmet." I wished for the plastic wrap.

"Brian wouldn't send that to us when we don't even have a home." Please let it be plastic wrap.

I opened the box "Damn-it Brian!" Darth stared up at me.

Robb squealed. "I love you Brain!” Great. I now get to live in a bedroom with two cats, two 60lb. dogs, and Darth.

Robb promptly put the helmet on to demonstrate how it breaths heavily like the movie character "Bwaa...Buuh. Bwaa... Buuh" and has the bellowing voice of James Earl Jones "There is no escape" or the best "Don't make me destroy you." Please. Destroy me. Now. The doorbell rings. I am saved!

I understood the mission of the person at the front door immediately. I saw The Watch Tower pamphlets and understood my dilemma. Ever since I was a little girl, I can remember turning away almost every single Jehovah’s Witness that knocked on the front door. One time I even made eye contact with one after they knocked on the door and ran to my bedroom. I had no shame. Today, because my bedroom was filled with animals, a litter box, and clothes that smell of fire and Darth was lurking somewhere else in the house, I felt opening the door was my only sanctuary. I know. I didn't believe it either.

"Hi there! How are you today?" The petite 60-year-old woman was so elated and excited. Even though she was much smaller than me, I still only opened the door slightly and kept it between the two of us, my hand on the doorknob just incase I changed my mind about this whole thing. She looked like her name might be Rita. I don't know why. Maybe because it was because I was craving Italian ice. I have learned not to question such things. The result of yielding to such whims is of course having a garden full of plants with names like "Dina" and "Lilith".

"Do you have a moment to read a section from the book of David with me?" Honestly, I am not sure what book Rita wanted me to read from. I was simply hoping to have a momentary escape from the Death Star.

"Sure" I said. I am sure I looked ridiculous in my hot pink sports shorts and t-shirt that read "Don't Curse".  We read a passage together and spoke generally about how one day God will bless us with a world without sickness.  I felt nauseous. I didn't feel I really understood the woman's translations of the reading, but it was really sunny outside, and the air smelled fresh. She seemed sweet so I didn't cut her off when she continued to talk. And then there was a change in the wind.

I heard it at first, and prayed Rita had not. That labored breathing from, deep space. "Bwaa..." inhale. "Buuh..." exhale. Maybe it is just my imagination. The TV had been switched to the Speed channel. I am sure Darth would not walk away from such indulgences.

Again. I heard it. "Bwaa...” inhale. "Buuh", exhale. This time it was louder and right behind me. The woman was no longer talking her jaw hung slightly open.

"He is right behind me isn't he?" I said looking into the eyes of the stunned and momentarily aged woman. She did not answer. Just nodded slowly whilst trying to maintain her pleasant composure. "Of course he is." I said cursing Brian in my head.

 Darth had more to say than I would have expected from a piece of plastic. "You don't know the power of the dark side!" Blasphemy.  I turned around and there stood Darth in his blue sport shorts and gray T-shirt with no shoes on. His arms were out to his sides making his chest broader. "There is no escape!"

I turned back Rita. She was managing a smile, but I could tell our time together had drawn to an end. "I am sure you didn't expect that today." I said shaking my head, neither embarrassed nor impressed.

"That's okay." She said with a smile showing itself upon her lips. "Sometimes when I turn to the book of Luke... " Then she began to whisper "... and this may be blasphemy, but I think to myself 'Luke I am your father.'" She put her hand over her mouth and giggled. She giggled then turned around and went to her car, put it into reverse and left.

I swear this happened. Every second. Sometimes, when life sucks, life really doesn't suck at all.

Darth.

Me and No Name Venus Flytrap.

Two Cats, Two 60# Dogs, and Darth

(This is what I "come home" to everyone!)

 Please don't hold your breath waiting for a picture of me in spandex or in my underwear. I promise I am doing us all a favor by not posting those:)

I hope that everyone who helped us knows that we love and appreciate everything you have done for us!! This section of my blog was by no means intended to make certain people feel as though they did more or less than others. Some gifts just had a story attached to them and we wanted to share those memories. 

 Darth Leeloo

Want to know how Robb and I have been raising funds to get us through the wreckage? Checkout GoFundMe.com!! It has really helped us get financial support through the generosity of friends and neighbors!!! 

Darth Vinnie

PLEASE DON'T JUDGE US!! WE ARE HOMELESS.

 Last but not least, Ashley Forsyth and Alisa Paykos-Theurer are throwing a Silpada Party to help us raise funds for the winter!!! Please check it out on Facebook !!! Thank you so very much for all of your love and support. Not a day goes by that we don't feel it!!

Please keep checking in for updates. The house has still been untouched by a single clean up or demolition crew but that should change in the next week or so! We will let you know how it goes!! Also, I will be including an entry on the timeline of events after a fire, what we suggest you do for fire emergency preparations, what we would have done differently after the fire and what we as individuals have learned about ourselves and our relationships with those around us!!!

Sifting Through The Rubble 2 & 1/2 Weeks Later

The first week was a blur. When I was in the fog, it all seemed so clear. Now that the haze is lifting, all clarity has escaped me like a breath from my chest. Shock does exist and it has many faces.

For Robb, it was to shut down, to let everything roll over him like a wave that forces you down to the sandy bottom and holds you there until it decides to let you free. For me it was hyper-vigilance, over protection, and control.

It was easy to fall into the roll of someone who would fix everything and somehow deny that anything ever happened at all.  I could write about it or tell the story and not feel too much pain. The hurt barely existed; until the moments it seemed to be the only thing that existed at all.

For the first week and a half, we would walk through the house and pull things out but I gave up hope once the decrepit smell began to linger. It was at the 2 week mark that I could no longer go inside. I would wait outside while Robb or my brother would bring out the charred belongings, for me to see in the sun.

The house has not been touched by a demolition or clean up crew since the fire. To this day it sits there and rots until the finalities of insurance handling comes through and we can begin the cleaning up process. This was something I never expected.  Part of me definitely thought everything would move pretty fast. There is no reasoning why I thought this to be true. I simply just assumed.

We had been in there a few times after the fire but this was the first day I would not visit and not go inside.  I had already pulled out the damp and ashen computer and photography equipment. My clothes are ruined and my jewelry is gone. The art has burned; my shoes and surfboards with it. I was now checking out.

Robb and Sean sifted through the rubble and I organized the items brought from the house and placed in the barn. Some furniture from the basement, though caked in a layer of soot, made it out reeking of smoke and rot.  Items I forgot about were brought into the light. Things that did not burn while everything around them had been turned to ash.

Robb is notorious for keeping the little notes I leave for him. 

This is one he has held onto for years... barely singed!

This is one of Robb's drawers and the comics he collected.

 Beasty and a Polaroid of Robb, Scott Negri, and David Sidner.

Christine's license plate melted but part of her emblem remains melted to the driveway.

The LP's were soaked but did not burn like most of the books!

Most of the old family negatives were lost but the twin lens might have a chance.

We have no idea how a lamp post 30 feet from the house melted but the gingerbread man that was in the fire looks brand new?!

On the left is a comic created by Robert's brother Jareth when he was young. It was in the garage and somehow survived to add some clever coincidence to the day.

Robb and I are generally doing well. We have some funny stories on the way and some information you may find helpful!! Keep checking in with us!!

Feel free to check out how some of our friends have decided to help us rebuild our lives!! 

Silpada Jewelry Fundraiser

Alisa Paykos-Theurer

Ashley Forsyth - Harrisburg Silpada Party

NEED HELP RECOVERING FROM A LOSS? CHECK OUT HOW FRIENDS AND FAMILY HAVE HELPED US TO RAISE FUNDS TO START FROM SCRATCH!!!

GoFundMe.com

Thank You once again for all of your love, support, and interest in our recovery. Without all of you we would be struggling to keep our heads above water!

We LOVE you!

xoxoxoxoox

Continuation.... Companies that didn't help!

So... I was so focused on the generous companies I didn't even mention their counterparts. I should really say counter part because there was really only one!! Can anyone guess? Drumroll please.......

Comcast Digital Cable: First of all, this is a link to their customer service site. When I called, I remember so concern for Robb or myself from the agent. She was frank, to the point and showed little empathy for our situation. Although, I was prepared to pay a bill for whatever equipment (cable boxes and modems) lost in the fire, I was not prepared for the lack of concern.
For a company of this size, and profit generation, I would have (if I am being quite honest) expected them to at least offer us a discount on reconnecting the house once we move back in. At the very least, I would have expected Comcast to say I am truly sorry for your loss. No dice.
We surprisingly recovered a box. It is covered in soot and smells of smoke but you had better believe I will hand deliver it to a Comcast location and let them know that I did not appreciate their lack of concern for their customer. I will let you know how it goes.

Which Companies Helped and Which One's Didn't!!!

These are some companies that have really come through for us during this time. Every business needs to make money and do their job, but it is a special business that goes far and beyond what you would expect them too. During a time of need in a poor economy, it is excellent customer care that keeps us all coming back!! We think these companies deserve some praise and credit!!! Here is some information to who they are and how they helped us!!

Progressive:  Our agent George Howe was incredibly kind and patient through this entire process. Because of the vehicle loss and damage, we had to call him on the day after the fire. He was very kind and anytime he called us or answered his phone he asked us how we were. We were slow to return phone calls and he still was patient and helpful. 
Progressive was also very generous in the reimbursement of the total loss of Robb's vehicle as well as very generous with the estimate to repair my car. Chris, over at Lawrence Chevrolet, spoke very highly of the progressive adjuster that came to write the estimate on my car. Chris said he was very helpful and cared about getting the repairs done right. I would recommend this insurance company to anyone!!!


Lawrence Chevrolet: Chris was very compassionate when I returned his phone call about my car. He immediately asked how Robb and I were and wished us well. I have never so much as met Chris, but he spent the time to go over everything with me and made it clear that they would do everything and more to fix my car up properly.
Chris also, said he was very sorry for the loss of Robb's car. He had received a photo of what the truck damage looked like and said he as happy everyone was okay. Chris was super sensitive to the sentimental value that truck had to Robb. Thank you Chris!!


Medtronic Minimed: A couple of weeks before the fire I had replaced my 3 month stock pile of insulin pump supplies. The fire took all of these items. Items I need to survive. I called Medtronic Minimed the day after the fire and explained the loss to them. I do not remember the name of the woman I spoke to but she was VERY sensitive to the urgency of my situation. She overnighted, free of charge, all the replacement supplies. It truly is stuff like this that saves your like.


1-800-Contacts: I called this company about two days after the fire, and explained how I lost the entire year supply of contacts in the fire. The agent on the phone was incredibly sympathetic. She replaced my entire supply at a huge discount and with free overnight shipping. This meant so much to me!!! I could see!!


Neflix: We lost 3 movies of theirs in the fire. Robb called them to inform them of the loss and that we would be downgrading our service. he says that the woman was incredibly helpful, and did not charge us for the dvds that were destroyed. I know it is not a huge deal, but it mean Robb and I that was did not have to pay for another charge.


Kohls: They helped us when we visited to return some clothes that were given to us but didn't fit. The manager Jamie was incredibly helpful. We did o have a reciept and needed to replace a few other items (like underwear) so we needed to buy things too. 
Jamie returned everything for us, and gave us a generous discount on the extra items we were buying. Jamie's mother was sick some years ago and she understood what it meant to someone to be be surrounded by a supportive community. Thank you Jamie!!


Capitol Area Animal Medical Center: This is a wonderful company to work for. The entire staff pulled together for a generous gift certificate not to mention some fantastic toys and treats for out pets. They provide wonderful care to their patients and support to their staff!!!


Petco: We of course had to replace leashes, and food. When we went to Petco to replace everything and used the card given to us by the Red Cross (as well as, explained our situation), the cashier gave us an additional discount and of course a couple of dog treats from the cookie treat bar.
Thank from all of us Petco!! We are forever loyal!


Primal Surf: I lived in Brigantine, NJ for a couple of years and when this amazing surf shop heard of what had happened, they sent us a care package full of new clothes. Susan, Michael, Mike and Zack Laielli were so kind and generous to reach out to us. I cannot tell you how nice new clothes feel on your back. It was definitely one of those things I took for granted!!
                            

We cannot fail to mention the help of The American Red Cross. They responded to our phone call the following day and picked us up at my parent's home. The 3 girls drive us to our home to asses the damage. Jessica Zercher was the specialist who arrived. She was incredibly kind and gentle.

The American Red Croos gave a us a visa card with money on it to use for things like clothes, shoes, medications, and dog food. This service has been invaluable to Robb and I. THANK YOU!!!

Just a remonder as well. Our friend Alisa Paykos-Theuer is throwing a Silpada jewelry party to help us fundraise. Check out the really AWESOME stuff they have on there. I drool a little bit everytime I look at this jewelry!!

Thank You so very much for all of your support. Robb and I will be added more of our personal experiences to this blog in the next day or so!! Robb and I cannot even believe the outpouring of support we are receiving for everywhere we go!!

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!

If you find yourself in a financial constraints, check out and see what we did on GoFundMe.com. We are so very sure it could help you too!!!

First Day Back at The Vet Clinic

Sunday night, the night before I would return to my part time job, I asked Robb to set his alarm for 8am the next morning. This would give me plenty of time to get ready and make it to work by 10am. I was wired. Couldn't fall asleep. Ambien had no effect and as long as the night felt, the alarm, like a fire alarm beeping, still came too soon, and all of a sudden, I was exhausted. 

Morning kisses are the best, but I still brushed them away. My chest heaved heavy with anxiety and could barely spare a breath. I tried reminding myself how much I loved working as a vet tech at Capitol Area Animal Medical Center. How much I cared about the people I worked with during all those long hours. These thoughts made no impact on the crater in my chest. I was paralyzed. I was more aware of how to function when I was surrounded by smoke than when I was surrounded by Robb's arms and blankets. I could feel Peter snuggling my foot.

Robb got up and made me coffee. The anger was returning. He told me he loved me but all I thought of was how my blood felt so thick. I tested my blood sugar. 212. I haven't had a morning blood sugar that high for a long time. Why me? Insulin.

I was waking up again. Robb was kissing my cheek. I wanted to be left alone. I felt so out of control but it was time for a shower. 

The ride to work was stressful for both of us. Robb drove the Jeep lent to us by the Vowlers and I sat staring out the zip down window. It was really pretty outside and smelled like earth and highway. He kept reaching over and to hold my hand. I let him but felt awful about not even looking at him. "I love you Julia."

Of course arriving at work was not painful at all. It was all the time leading up to it. If one could really love their work place, then that person is me. Every single person in that Veterinary Clinic works as hard as the next. Each person gets the job done. Each person earns every single penny they make every day. I would not cry today. Not once.

I made it to the kitchen and a basket with a note addressed to Robb and I sat on the table. Tears. Damnit. The girls had written notes to Robb and I inside the card and personalities spilled from the interior as a variety of handwriting and punctuation offered love and support. Snot dripped onto my lips. I would be lying if I said I didn't lick it away.

They had given us a gift generous certificate and plenty of toys for the dogs and cats. I had not yet replaced a single one of those things. So sweet. I blew my nose into a Wendy's napkin and spilled coffee on my shoe. 

The day went as such. Sharing stories of my past week. My co-workers and the doctor's sharing their stories from the week I missed at work. This is how it was before as well and there was no weight on my chest. I thought of Robb. How he must be feeling... thinking about how I had acted this morning. 

Robb had a full day planned. He has been attending Harrisburg Area Community College and worked the opposite of tirelessly for his 3.9GPA. He is studying to become a radiology technician. A choice he made after working 10 years in the motorcycle industry and an education in Fine Art. No simple feet at the age of 42. He works just as hard, if not harder than I do to make our lives better.

HACC, for whatever malfunction, never received his payment for his fall session. They dropped him around the time the fire happened. He has no computer, or receipt to prove that he registered and paid online. They did not take his money from his account, so something had gone wrong, and he is still waiting to hear from his advisor about what to do. He is sleeping right next to me and drooling a bit on the pillow. He snores like a congested short nosed lion. 

It was a long day. It took me about an hour to decompress. I had not realized that emotionally vomiting all over people was so exhausting. And that is what my co-workers let me do all day. I also realized that assisting a euthanasia on someone's beloved pet digs deeper when you were so close to loosing your own beloved creatures. It was one of those unexpected lessons you learn. Like the time I learned that skinny dipping or streaking takes on a whole new context when you are the only one doing it.

Thank you all, once again for checking in with us. Today was a bad start for me and even a rough ending. It was the uplifting efforts of old friends that helped me to sit down and write this entry today.

xoxoxoxo

Vinnie's Face When We Pulled Out The Pet Gifts From Work

. Peter and Piper Going Crazy Town on Their New Toys

We are so very lucky to have so many people hugging and supporting us from all over the country. I would not have expected even a fraction of this response from people. What is even more interesting and, in my opinion incredibly creative, is an old college friend wants to donate the proceeds she makes from selling Silpada jewelry. Check it out even if it is just to get a look at some pretty cool stuff!

www.mysilpada.com/alisa.theurer

Please share these resources with friends and family. It is simply by getting the word out that we can educate each other on the options that lay before us when we are truly in need!! 

Please feel free to follow our fund raising efforts at GoFundMe.com

You all deserve to know who you are supporting and how your love and efforts have helped us be Born from Ash.

If you would like to see who I am as an artist please visit Julia Conroy Photography, Inc.

The Night Before My First Day Back

Since the fire, we have been wondering zombies, although we had no need to feed. Robb was in shock for about three days after the fire. He barely spoke, and when he did it was not very coherent. I once caught him eating food and letting it just fell out of his mouth as though his face was paralyzed. This was his coping mechanism.
Mine was anger. I was angry at Robb for not being present. I wanted him to be there, I mean there, right next to me. But instead he just looked right through me. I cried. I knew how alone we both were feeling and could do nothing to make the other feel better. I was afraid he was too traumatized and would not come back. I was afraid to go through this without him.
We still had to meet with the insurance adjusters, cancel our bills, put shoes on our feet and underwear on our hides. Was Robb going to be "gone" for all of this? The pain I felt for him was as real as the razor blades that slid up my back when I opened the bedroom door. Tears. More tears.
A few days after the fire, we met with a psychiatrist regarding acute post traumatic stress. Robb was more aware that day. Holding conversations and remembering things. Things I didn't even know had happened. When he looked into my eyes, for the first time in days I saw him behind the blue. My favorite color blue in the whole world.
The following couple of days consisted logistic like obtaining my License. Robb had the strength to do it the monday after the fire... even though he has no recollection of going to the DMV. We also had to meet with the banks to check our accounts, order new checks, and organize our savings. Thank goodness for a savings.
We needed shoes and underwear. Thankfully, the Red Cross arrived at my parents home the very next day. They picked us up to take us down the street to our hurt home where they determined what type of help they can offer us. Robb was wearing my Dad's Shirt, pants, and shoes. My Dad is 6'3" and Robb is 5'8". I wore my cousins shorts, shirt, and shoes. My cousin is a boy. I wore my hair in a tight bun.
Robb and I used some of the money to get shoes and food. The money also covered my insulin and hypothyroid meds. Fantastic! The Red Cross was absolutely amazing!
My Good friend Kyle's family lent Robb and I their Jeep for as long as we needed (even though we would love to keep it longer... it is super fun!!). This was one of those generous offers that still makes Robb and I very tingly and smile. How kind they were to do so!!
It was surprising how much of a glaze was put over everything. Interacting with people seemed weird and alien. I had a break down in Khols because I realized how many clothes, shoes, and collections of jewelry I had lost. I felt like there was a whole apple just sitting in my belly. I know it was just stuff, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't attached to my jewelry.
Overall, the week went smoothly. When I say smoothly I disregard the times I have told my aunts to "leave me alone", screamed "I don't know what to tell you to do!", or just plain stomped my foot and ran into a spare bedroom. We were visited by our good friends Kyle Vowler, Liz an Daniel Kerr, Liz Holtzman, Mary and Lind Jameson, and of course our crazy wild aunts, uncles and cousins. Robb, seemed to be getting better every day though. This gave me hope and confidence.
Today was my rough day. I did not want to get out of bed. I could not think of why I should.
Honestly speaking I am nervous for my first day back at work tomorrow. I hope I don't cry all over myself.
Robb will be with my sweet brother Sean, aiming to get things under control. HACC dropped him from hi classes because they say they never received the money. The receipt burned in the fire along with his phone and computer. He had a 3.9 GPA last semester and through summer classes. What a set back. My sweet man. I know he will make the best of it!
Okay. so week one is officially over. Thanks for checking in. I am going to include some photos from the dogs walk today. I am testing my Nikon D200 out after it received heavy smoke damage. It is my work horse!

From Ashley, Josh, Riley and Haley. I love them so much!

 Pine Trees in a Thunderstorm

 A New Orchid to Help us Heal

Aloe is great for burns!!

 Leeloo Water Monster

 Vinnie of the Moss

Once again Thank You very much for checking in. This is quite a Journey.

With Love,

Jules and Robb

One Week Later

One week ago, on Sunday July 31st,  Robb tinkered with his Harley shovel head in the garage that begged to be called a man cave. I of course was annoyed at the sound of the engine chug chugging, so I did the only normal thing a fiance would do when her mechanically inclined man is inclined to be mechanical at 10pm on a Sunday night. I flicked him off with my right hand because those fingers are longer and of course he made a sad face with lips formed so bent upside down you'd be inclined to hang a bucket from them. Then he smiled as he happily continued to tighten up the bike, properly nicknamed "Beasty". I accepted defeat, and gladly made my way to the only room that was air conditioned.


It was probably around 9:30pm when I went into the bedroom. Funny, I remember the exact time at which I walked the dogs that day (6:42pm-I had looked at the clock because I was wondering if it was time for my Lean Cuisine dinner yet. The diet was going well.), but could not for the life of me tell you what time it was when our lives changed so drastically. 


The bedroom was the only room in the house that had air conditioning, so all the animals were in there hanging out. Vinnie and Leeloo we slamming their heads into each other tangibly excited to be chewing on my gym sock. Bad dogs. My gym sock.The cats Peter and Piper were unimpressed by their temporary imprisonment. I think Peter may have pooped in my shoe.


I had probably been in there for a half an hour, watching some awfully decadent Tv on BRAVO whilst texting my good friend Liz about hiking plans for the week. She and I were on a roll for a while, but I had been overwhelmed with poor time management that I had failed to make my way to Big Boyd for any sort of exercise. It was because I was so focused on minimizing the size of the spare tire I carry around my waist daily, that I was actually annoyed when the fire alarm went off. I thought Robb was burning one of my lean cuisine pizzas in the oven. I needed that pizza, it was 350 calories and absolutely delicious. Bad Robb. My pizza.


I jumped out of bed and swung the door open ready to let Robb receive the verbal equivalent of the ultimate fighting challenge (Battle to the Death). It was when I swung the door open and stepped forward that I was met by an immense body of black smoke. This body had definitely been training for The Ultimate Fighting Challenge since lighting struck a pile of dry shrubs outside a caveman's man cave.


My stomach dropped and I could feel razor blades of terrors streaming up along my back. My blood was ice but my skin felt like the sun. I felt as though I could vomit, ducked my head below the boiling virulent smoke that almost gently hung 3 feet from the ceiling. I could see well enough into the kitchen no make my way to the cool tile and scream from Robb. He met me in the kitchen sweaty and more terrified than I can honestly remember ever seeing anyone.


"The house is on fire, Jules!" he screamed, as I could see the fire breathing from under his motorcycle. Was this the fire that caused all of this smoke? Could we fight this fire? Robb disappeared. "I am going to try and put it out!" He yelled. Surely this is not happening. Surely we can put this out ourselves and just have to deal with the smoke damage. 


I ran to the bedroom. The dogs were no longer laughing and the cats tails were fluffy with anxiety. I grabbed the dogs. They were too scared to move."Good dogs. Good dogs. Let's go for a walk. Good dogs, come on babies." I cooed to them. The smoke was dropping deeper into the hallway, and we ducked lower to keep our mouths free. I am sure the dogs did not consciously do this, but there is no way to explain how they actually crawled out of there.


We made it to the front door. I cannot remember if it was already open or not. I do know that the closer we got to the exit, the more I notice that it was darker inside of the house than it was outside during the night. The smoke was like a black hole.I did not see Robb. I did not have leashes. How big was the fire now? My car door was unlocked. I put the dogs inside. Sanctuary. Saftey.


I am not sure of the order in which I did things next. I know that I could see the flames glowing through the yellow garage door. I knew Robb was still inside. I knew the I could not see inside of the house because smoke was roaring from the doorway. Piper showed her face in the doorway. I picked her up and put her in the car with Leeloo and Vinnie. 


I turned on the hose. The measly hose that barely had enough pressure to wash away a Brown Marmorated Stink Bug. A potted plant was sacrificed and thrown threw the glass in the door next to the glowing garage door. I sprayed, drizzled, dripped water through the shattered window. It was too late. I only saw flames, breathed smoke, sweat ash. Thought of Robb.


I don't know how I found him inside, but the next thing was we were back in the fresh air. Eyes burning. Robb grabbed the hose and tried to put out the savagely growing orange and red beast. He was too close to the flames. Why I ran back in the house I don't know, but I was holding my breath and squinting my eyes and arrived right at the cordless phone. Back outside. Fresh air. Sticky air. Hot air. 


The 911 call was very calm. Then very erratic. "Hi. This is Julia Conroy. My house is on fire. I live at 3321 Fishing Creek Valley Rd." I told the dispatcher. He asked is everyone out. "Yes". Is everyone okay "Yes." He told us not to try and put it out ourselves. I lost it. "Robert!!!! Getting away from the F***ING FIRE!!! He said not to try and put out the fire!! Put down the F***ING HOSE!!".


He was so close to the flames. I think I threw the phone. I was in my bare feet, in purple short spandex and a bright green tank top. He was only in shorts. No shoes. No shirt. No Robb. I saw his eyes and he was just looking straight through me trying to spray the house with our sad little hose. I think the hose was crying more than anything. 


Robb just stood there. I started to hit him. To push him away. I punched his chest and screamed in his face. I wanted him to come back to me. I kept hitting him and backing him from the fire with my rage and fear. He looked at me and turned towards the house. "I have to go in and get the dogs." He was so quiet. I followed him screaming that I had already lead the dogs out. But he went in anyway.


I will forever replay what happened next. I stood on the stoop as he crossed the black clouded threshold and grabbed him by his shorts. I grabbed him and swung him around. I threw him out of the house and onto the ground. He hit so hard. I knew I hurt him. I was crying. Peter was inside but I would not tell Robb. 


I grabbed Robb as he tried to go inside again. I turned and Peter snuck out of the doorway. I shooed him (while I held Robb by his shorts) hoping he would run away and he did. Everyone was out. Everyone was safe.


 Robb's car was between my car and the garage only a few feet from each. The dogs and Piper were in my car and Robb's car was on fire. We had to get the animals.


I lead Robb to the car and showed him they were okay. We held the dogs by their collars and I scruffed Piper. Peter was no where in site but he was out. We walked to the far side of our front yard and I yelled for help. I could see our neighbors but they could not see us. Shock resonated from their faces. They were scared too. I heard loud horrible sounds of terror. It took me a little while to realize it was me screaming for help. 


Our neighbors found us and helped us across the street. It was from that side of the road we watched our home burn. It could not have been more than a few minutes since I heard the smoke alarm. We were safe an sat there for a couple of hours and watched as firemen quieted down the storm that raged through our home. Robb visited the ambulance for a laceration and minor burns.


Robb had enlightened us to the fired starting from his bike while he was working on it. It wouldn't be until day or so later that we would learn the bike had fallen on top of him while he was working on it. It had trapped him beneath it while it leaked gas and caught fire. He can remember watching the fire spread around him while he lay under 800 lbs of metal. He cannot remember how he got out from beneath the bike.


It was in the ambulance that I realized how close he had been to the fire. Paint from the garage floor had melted onto his toenails. His legs, arms and shorts were smudged with paint. With pain. He was alive.


Later that night. Before we would travel the quarter mile down the road to my parent's house, I would find Peter hiding, uninjured in the tree line. He, or course, ran past me and tried to make it through the wreckage back into the house. Thankfully, I learned to tackle animals and sibling when I was little. Peter had no chance. He was mine.

Today, a week later we are making our way through the wreckage. We are thankful for all of the love and support we have received not only from family and friends, but from people we barely even know. This is only the first entry in our blog. Please follow us along, as we try and figure out how to be Born from Ash.

Robb's Truck - This was his Baby. His Love. His Christine The Green Machine.

My Car Melted but can be SAVED!

The Garage. In the middle you can see Robb's motorcycle "Beasty" and 

my families sitting mowers on either side.

Behind the House.

The basement and least damaged spot in the house.

Our Stairs :(

Our Kitchen and Dining Area

The Living Room

Our Hallway

Our Bathroom

Our Spare Room... and my favorite nap spot.

Our Bedroom and Sanctuary.

Thank you everyone. Thank you for reading. Thank you for supporting us. Thank you for loving us. 

xoxoxoxoxo